What Happens When You Stop Following Instructions

This week feels all about the how, not just the what.

There's something incredible that happens when you learn something new—not facts, but skills and abilities you didn't know you were capable of. When you understand the how and why behind something, you're not just learning a technique. You're changing your brain chemistry and your concept of self.

Here's what I mean: when someone teaches you how to do something instead of just telling you what to do, you come face-to-face with your own limitations. You encounter the voice that says "I can't do this." And when you push through that resistance and discover you actually can do it, something fundamental shifts. Your nervous system rewires. Your sense of what's possible expands. You literally become a different person.

You know the saying: give someone a fish, they eat for a day; teach them how to fish, they eat for a lifetime. But it goes deeper than that.

When you learn how to fish—when you understand the mechanics, the timing, the patience required—you're not just gaining a skill. You're developing self-reliance and a new self-concept. You're taking responsibility for your own survival and success. You stop waiting for someone else to provide for you and start providing for yourself.

This is where self-responsibility is born: in the moment you realize you play a bigger role in your circumstances than you previously understood. In the process of learning how to do things, you develop discernment—the capacity to sense what's happening in your own body and mind, your reactions, your patterns. You start trusting your own judgment instead of looking outside yourself for all the answers.

And this is where humanity comes in.

I watched Superman recently, and one thing struck me: the whole world wanted to make him a reflection of their own lack of humanity. But it was precisely his deep sense of self and his own humanity that allowed him to take responsibility, stay rooted in who he was, and ultimately heal the world.

When you take responsibility for learning, for growing, for becoming capable—you touch your own humanity. You discover what you're made of. You develop compassion for the struggle, patience for the process, and respect for what it takes to truly master something.

This self-awareness and self-respect naturally extends to how you see others. When you've done the work of learning something difficult, you recognize that same struggle in everyone around you. You stop expecting others to be perfect because you know how hard it is to grow. You start seeing people as fellow travelers on the path of becoming rather than obstacles to your happiness.

The practice is a mirror and it becomes a vessel to learn how to do one thing—whatever it is—with love, attention, curiosity, and tenacity. In cultivating those qualities within yourself, you make them yours and carry them into the world.

I learned long ago: "How you do anything is how you do everything."

The humanity piece comes when you can see yourself with loving kindness through the learning process and extend that same dignity to others. We all start as beginners. We all face limitations. We all have the capacity to grow beyond what we thought possible.

Here's what practice has taught me: we're quick to blame others because we see massive problems out in the world that seem impossible to solve. But every problem we perceive outside is a reflection of our own internal state.

You cannot simultaneously play the victim and be self-responsible. You cannot be connected to your humanity while believing the world owes you something for your suffering.

The only person who owes you anything is you. And what you owe yourself is to become so self-aware, so willing to learn and grow, that you completely transform how you show up in the world. You embody fully what you believe everyone else should, without expecting anything from anyone.

This shift changes the course of humanity. When you know you're capable of learning, of growing, of becoming more than you were—you stop seeing yourself as fixed and limited. You start asking: "If I can learn this, what else can I learn? If I can change this pattern, what other patterns can I change?"

That curiosity and possibility naturally extends to how you see others. Instead of writing people off as "just the way they are," you start seeing their potential for growth. Instead of being threatened by others' success, you're inspired by proof of what's possible. Instead of seeing others as the stick by which you measure yourself, you have an internal sense of sense that is unwavering. 

Each time you connect with yourself through the process of learning something new, how you see everything shifts. How you show up in the world shifts. And each day, that becomes clearer and more aligned with who you want to be.

A peacemaker. A beacon of light and goodness, or whatever you aspire to.

The practice of learning—of taking responsibility for your own growth—is powerful because it asks you to consistently face your own limitations and transcend them. It demands that you stop pointing fingers and start looking inward at what you can control and change.

This is why at Haia, we don't just bark orders or give you instructions to follow. We teach you the how and why behind every movement, every breath, every alignment. Because when you understand why you're doing something and how it works in your body, you're not just following someone else's choreography—you're developing your own inner compass. You're building the capacity to sense what you need, when you need it, and how to give it to yourself.

We're not interested in creating followers or being part of a trend. We're committed to developing leaders—people who know how to fish and learn not to blame the lake when it's dried up, but to grow a garden they can cultivate as well. People who can take responsibility for their own growth, who can trust their own discernment and carry that wisdom into every area of their lives.

The revolution you're looking for starts with you. The peace you want to see begins with your willingness to be honest with yourself. The love you're seeking emerges when you take responsibility for becoming the person capable of giving and receiving it.

The practice of learning—of taking responsibility for your own growth—is powerful because it asks you to consistently face your own limitations and transcend them. It demands that you stop pointing fingers and start looking inward at what you can control and change.

The revolution you're looking for starts with you. The peace you want to see begins with your willingness to be honest with yourself. The love you're seeking emerges when you take responsibility for becoming the person capable of giving and receiving it.

Wake up. The world needs your humanity. And that can only be found when you take full responsibility for who you are and who you're becoming.

The how is everything. Start there.